StupidiNews!

• Spanish officials report 77 are dead after a major passenger train derailment near Santiago de Compostela in northwest Spain.
• President Obama will nominate JFK's last surviving daughter Caroline Kennedy as US Ambassador to Japan.
• British officials heeded public outcry that the country's revamped currency would only feature male historical figures and will place author Jane Austen on the ten-pound note.
• Tropical Storm Dorian is slowly churning its way towards the Caribbean Sea with winds at 50 MPH and could affect US weather next week.
• Facebook scored a major earnings beat as the social media company made a third of a billion dollars in the second quarter of 2013.